“Free choices is one of the highest of all mental processes”
– Dr. Maria Montessori
We should give plenty of opportunities to children to make choices for themselves. It could be very simple choice of
“Should I wear a blue or brown pant”
“Could I drink my milk after playtime”
These choices allow the children to discover their needs, interest and also experience the outcome. At times it surprises them, “Yes, I can do it” or “This option is better than that”
It is interesting to observe different parenting styles. It is commendable to see few parents allowing their child to come to school in their favourite T-shirt every alternate day or to wear one purple sock and other blue sock. Nice to give that space to children and see things from their perspective.
At times it is disheartening to see parents withholding these choices from their children out of love and care. For example
“It would be difficult for you, let me do it for you”
“I think you would like Vanilla ice-cream, so you have Vanilla flavour”
“Do your home-work else no play time”
Freedom of choice does not mean children are allowed to do as they wish, however freedom within limits gives the child the framework within which he/she can choose from. These limits work best when it is decided by the adult and child. For example-
“Toys needs to be put back in the toy basket before bedtime, do you want to do it now or after dinner”
Sometimes as adults, we can imagine only few solutions to a problem, however when children are involved, they come up with creative solutions which an adult would not CNNeven have considered. It encourages trust, open communication and interactive relationship.
Over a period of time this freedom of choice becomes a habit and children are able to independently take decisions for themselves and not by following directions.